The Waiting Game

I've been resisting the urge to test.  I'm at 12 DPO.  Last month, I started spotting on the Friday night and had a full CD1 on the Saturday.  So if this cycle didn't work, I expect to find out this weekend.  Which will be a pain, since I have orchestra concerts on Friday and Sunday.  At the same time, if this cycle did work, since the concerts are with my church, I would have people to pray with me for a healthy pregnancy, even before I would know how many babies are in there.  I haven't had any implantation bleeding, but that doesn't necessarily mean anything since I did with the first pregnancy but did not with the second.

Last weekend, we had the birthday party for the now-10-year-old, and today we had an appointment for one of the kids that I had been thinking about a lot.  Now that those are past, I do have the concerts this weekend with rehearsal tomorrow and Thursday nights.  However, that's the only thing major enough to distract me from thinking about whether I have a baby inside me or not.  I have a huge convention coming up at the end of the month that I'm looking forward to, but I can't see anything past this weekend and the concerts and finding out whether this cycle worked.  I have plenty of things I SHOULD be working on, but I can't see anything past this weekend and the concerts and finding out whether this cycle worked.

I think about whether this cycle worked when I'm going to sleep and Papa Bear has his arm around me resting on my belly.  I think about whether this cycle worked when I'm driving to work.  I think about whether this cycle worked when I'm tending my toddler, wondering whether I will be able to give him a sibling (or more than one).  I think about whether this cycle worked when I'm piddling around on Facebook and playing my silly Game of Thromes game.  I even think about whether this cycle worked during client sessions (along with thinking about what my client is saying...ahh, the magic of ADHD).

But I'm resisting the urge to test.