Saturday, September 17, 2011

Punctures and Punctuation

Tonight I was supposed to have my trigger shot for my egg retrieval.  This month feels like nothing but should-have-beens and no-time-soons.  This feeling was, as DH put it, punctuated tonight by going to an event at the curling club and (in addition to seeing a pregnant woman I didn't know) finding out that one friend and one acquaintance are pregnant.  I'm glad for my friend, but at the same time, each one is another puncture wound in my heart.

I think I'll be dealing with things a bit better once September and maybe the first part of October are over, once we're past all of the days that were written down on my schedule of events.  I sure as hell hope so, at least.  I can't take it if it doesn't get better.

DH was suggesting that I try to do more things with people who aren't parents.  I went out with the UM clarinets for tapas last night and had a lot of fun.  It felt good and was what I needed, a chance to not deal with it all for a night.  DH has (half-jokingly, half-seriously) batted around the possibility of banning me from Facebook when there is one pregnancy announcement after another upsetting me.  The problem is, Facebook is no worse than my real life when it comes to that.

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